Santa's Elves don't make this unique brand of crap.  
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Family Argument Bingo
Here is a fun game I invented.  It is a game of bingo that is played by the innocent bystanders at the Holiday table.  Now, instead of enduring the pain and suffering of another family argument, you can sit with a sly grin on your face waiting for Uncle Charley to launch another racial slur.  Here is how it works.

1. Print, cut out and then hand out a card to everyone that you think wants to play. Try not to give cards to instigators or angry folks.  These folks make the game happen much like the caller in the bingo parlor.  
2.   Whenever one of the terms or words on your card is used in family conversation, you can mark it down.  
3.   The winner is the first person to get 5 across, down, or diagonally. 
4.  For severely dysfunctional families you can play "Ultra Argument Bingo" where the winner must fill out their entire card.  
5.  Visit ExtremeHolidayIdeas.com for more fun holiday ideas.  

There you have it.  A free game for you to play at the Thanksgiving table.  Have fun.